Michael culled these from lower level English composition classes in the early 1980s.
- "Maturity and experience come with age."
- "Most spectators see Formula One drivers as people who stop at nothing to win."
- "As an end product of each class, I received a letter grade from A to F, excluding E."
- "When reality finally sets in, the true fan will feel as though a close freind [sic] had died."
- "Students are now in school to get degrees so they can get a descent [sic] job."
- "The two city council candidates do not frequent the pool thusly they did not have enough information to make a valid claim that the department wastes money on lifeguards."
- "The president is only a figurehead with a birthright position."
- "It was a very encomppassing book which captivated my attention until the very end."